My Complete and Utter Disappointment with the Final Smash Bros. Direct

Sakurai

So the final Nintendo Direct dedicated to Super Smash Bros. is done. And it sucked.

The good news is that Bayonetta is in the game. The bad news is… everything else.

Along with more information on the previously announced Cloud (who I couldn’t care less about), we got one additional new character… Corrin! Who’s that, you might ask? It’s the main character from the upcoming Fire Emblem Fates, a game that’s currently only released in Japan. That’s right, another Fire Emblem character. Because lord knows there aren’t enough anime swordfighters in Smash Bros. already. At the very least it’s not more damn Kid Icarus characters, I guess.

Let’s do a head count though, we have Marth, Ike, Roy, Lucina and Robin all from Fire Emblem in the game. And now with Corrin, that’s six characters. That ties it with Pokemon in represented characters, and is surpassed only by Mario. I’m not going to complain about the Mario and Pokemon characters, because their series are relevant enough to justify that many characters, not to mention that each of their represented characters are pretty distinct. Aside from Robin, all of the Fire Emblem characters are basically in the same category. A category that is also filled by Pit, Shulk, and that useless waste of space called Dark Pit.

Meanwhile, Donkey Kong and Metroid are still only at two characters apiece. And Metroid’s two characters are just variants of the same character. Forget that they’re two of Nintendo’s most iconic and acclaimed series. They get two. Kid Icarus gets three, and Fire Emblem gets a small army. Because I guess the series has become Super Weaboo Bros.

No new DK characters, no new Metroid characters. No newly represented franchises (Inklings please!). But that’s not the worst part.

No. The grand crescendo of this Smash suckage was the reveal that Nintendo and Square-Enix had come to an agreement on another addition to the series. Yes, they finally revealed Geno is coming to Super Smash Bros!

As a Mii Fighter costume…

"Proof that Sakurai hates us all."

“Proof that Sakurai hates us all.”

A freaking Mii Fighter costume. After years and years of hoping, wanting and dreaming. This is how Sakurai decides to represent the beloved classic, Super Mario RPG? This is nothing short of a kick to the crotch and a snidely middle finger raised on Sakurai’s part.

Yes, Bayonetta being added to Smash Bros. is cool (she apparently won the fan vote). But the persistent weaboo-centric additions to the series, and the constant slap to the face of more deserving characters (K. Rool costume!) has greatly soured me to Super Fire Emblem Smash Bros. The whole Geno trolling bit was the last straw. I think it will be a long, long time before I play Smash Bros. again. And that, coming from me, is saying a whole lot.

Blech!

Advertisements

4 thoughts on “My Complete and Utter Disappointment with the Final Smash Bros. Direct

  1. Red Metal

    As odd as it may sound, I can sort of understand there being that many Fire Emblem characters in Smash Bros; that series has a lot of great characters to choose from. If nothing else, I appreciate that the series is getting more attention – especially with the success of Fire Emblem: Awakening. I think we can agree that the Metroid series is great, but it really isn’t as dependent on its characters as Nintendo’s other franchises, so it makes sense that for the longest time, Samus was the series’ sole representative. I suppose they could add Ridley, but then fans would be complaining that his size is wrong. The only other choice I could think of would be Adam… and I think we know how good of an idea that would be.

    Otherwise yeah, it looks like there are a lot of redundant characters. Cloud’s inclusion is especially odd because he’s only related to Nintendo in an extremely tangential sense (i.e. the series he originated from debuted on the NES). Including Terra or Cecil would have made more sense.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. themancalledscott Post author

      I’m actually not too upset about the lack of Metroid characters, but I understand a lot of people are. It is seen as the “third” Nintendo series after all (after Mario and Zelda, of course).

      However, the fact that Dixie Kong still isn’t in the series is ridiculous.

      But what really just killed it for me was the Geno Mii Fighter costume. That was just Sakurai giving people the middle finger. So many people, especially myself, have wanted Geno in the series since Snake was first announced for Brawl back in 2006. Heaven knows Square isn’t planning a Super Mario RPG 2, so adding Geno to Smash Bros. was basically the only means to get that game some modern day recognition (not to mention his moveset writes itself). Plus, he’s one of the third-party characters who would make the most sense, seeing as he’s a Mario character. But after nine years of people wanting the character, they just throw together a Mii Fighter costume… In all my years as a video game fan, I don’t think I’ve ever been so disappointed.

      Like

      Reply
  2. Pingback: The Force Awakens Delivers! | Wizard Dojo

  3. alex9234

    I don’t know what to really say about this blog here. Like Red Metal said, the inclusion of so many FE characters is understandable, and that Metroid only having 2 characters is understandable as well.

    “weaboo” – I don’t think that word means what you think it means.

    Plus, Bayonetta won the fan vote, so we can rule out Cloud getting in because of the ballot – a lot of Japanese polls didn’t have Cloud listed as a wanted character. I think there’s an entirely different reason as to why Cloud is in Smash, but I’ll save that for another time when we hear more info. But your complaints don’t really come off as very compelling to me. It comes off as mostly nitpicking. You saying that it’ll be a while before you play Smash again almost sounds like you want Sakurai to be fired. Not trying to be a dick, but it’s that your complaints don’t really come off as compelling and just sounds petty.

    Like

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s