*Review based on Battletoads in Battlemaniacs release as part of the Nintendo Switch Online Service*
Few names are as infamous in the world of video games as Battletoads. Rare’s riff on the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles provided a game that was not only considered the most difficult in the NES library, but even today many people will point to it as the most difficult video game ever made (and not always for the right reasons). Despite its ludicrous difficulty, Battletoads was popular enough to warrant a franchise for a time (even being rebooted in 2020 by Dlala Studios). The series made the jump to the Super Nintendo in 1993 with Battletoads in Battlemaniacs, which serves as kind of a sequel to, and kind of a remake of the NES game. Strangely, while the original Battletoads has seen numerous re-releases over the years (even Battletoads Arcade made it into Rare Replay), Battlemaniacs didn’t see any form of re-release until it launched on the Nintendo Switch Online Service in late February 2024. Though I have to admit, we weren’t missing much in its absence. While Battlemaniacs definitely looks better and has (relatively) smoother controls than its predecessor, it still suffers from the same callously unfair difficulty of the original.
Battlemaniacs sees two of our disgustingly named heroes, Rash and Pimple, travel to a virtual reality world called “the Gamescape” in order to save the third Battletoad, Zits (the Battletoads aren’t cool enough to ever have all three available for the adventure, as Pimple was kidnapped in the original). The Battletoads’ nemesis, the Dark Queen, has teamed up with another baddie named Silas Volkmire in order to take over the Gamescape and the real world (they also kidnapped some CEO’s daughter. Though why that was necessary to the story, I’m not sure). So Rash and Pimple have to fight their way through six stages in order to defeat the Dark Queen and Volkmire, and save their friends.
I have to say, Rare really got the look, feel and tone of the Saturday morning cartoons of the time down pat. The anthropomorphic animal heroes, the “extreme” attitude, outlandish baddies, and even more outlandish character names all feel ripped straight out of the kind of cartoons that were airing at the time. They even had the gross-out humor of the 90s checked off with the names of the Battletoads. The 16-bit overhaul means that the Saturday morning cartoon mentality of the series even shines through in the game’s visuals this time around. And the music (partly composed by David Wise) includes some real bangers that help liven things up.
Sadly, that same attention to detail was not applied to fine-tuning the game. On the surface Battletoads in Battlemaniacs, despite having half the stages of the NES game, features a good deal of variety, with each stage playing differently than the last. The first level is a straight-up beat-em-up, while the second combines that with descending down a giant tree and avoiding hazards. The third, meanwhile, is the infamous Turbo Tunnel, where the toads ride on speeders while avoiding oncoming obstacles.
“Aw damn…”
Wait a minute! These are the same stages as the NES game!
Yes, despite being the big 16-bit sequel to Battletoads, Battlemaniacs ultimately feels more like a remake. Its six stages recycle the framework of half of those from the original, albeit expanded upon and with more visual splendor. Though lacking in originality they may be, at least every stage is distinct from one another. It’s a shame more developers can’t squeeze in as much variety in the lengthy games of today as Rare could in just six levels on the Super Nintendo.
Battlemaniacs can also be played with two players in two different modes. One of which, like the first game, allows the players to injure each other, while the other mode (the only sane option) turns that feature off. At least this time Rare gave players an option, but given how insanely difficult the game already is, it shouldn’t even have the team attack option at all. It makes the game unplayable.
That difficulty is the game’s great flaw. I’m all for difficult games, being a fan of titles like Dark Souls and Elden Ring and what have you. But there’s a distinct difference between a game that’s difficult because of how it was designed, and a game that just feels unfair and comes across like none of its developers ever playtested it. Considering I keep bringing up the difficulty of Battletoads, I think you know which category I think Battlemaniacs falls into.
The Battletoads series is one of the few instances where a game’s difficulty doesn’t simply seem hard, but feels like the developers were playing some kind of sick, cruel prank on the player. While one would hope Rare would learn from their mistakes when making the sequels, sadly, Battlemaniacs feels like it’s pulling the same pranks as its predecessor, only now in 16-bits! The six stages of Battletoads in Battlemaniacs all have the potential to be something great, but each of them ultimately stumbles because, rather than design these stages carefully so players can gradually learn from their mistakes, here the mistakes are all on Rare, as their idea of difficulty when designing this series seemed to be to throw everything and the kitchen sink at players (often at a split second’s notice) and then faulting the player for not knowing what was going to happen ahead of time.
“The fourth stage, where the player hops across and climbs giant snakes, is my personal favorite.”
Take for example, the second stage. There’s a moment where fans try to blow the player into spiky logs as they descend, with the player having to push the character forward to fight the gust of the fans. Then all of a sudden, one of the fans pulls the player into the spikes, with no visual distinction between this fan and any of the others. It’s one thing to change things up, it’s another to outright give the player the middle finger by changing the rules the game itself established without any indication.
Then we have that damned third level, which requires absolutely perfect reflexes and complete memorization of the stage’s obstacles. That may sound standard for games at the time, except that the level drags on and on for so long – and with so few checkpoint – that asking players to memorize it, let alone have perfect precision every time, is just ridiculous. Oh, and you only get three lives and three continues to beat the whole game. If those run out, it’s back to the beginning of the whole game for you (because why not punish the player for the game’s own poor design?). There is a cheat code you can enter at the title screen (hold down, A and B and press start), but all that does is increase the lives and continues to five. It helps a little, but so little it just feels like another means for the game to mock you.
A couple of bonus stages are played after the second and fifth levels, in which the player has the chance to win extra lives, but of course the game uses this as another opportunity to mess with the player. As the toads ride a giant hockey puck and collect points (100 points for an extra life), enemies and obstacles litter the field – again often showing up at a split seconds’ notice – and take your points away upon contact. By the time these bonus stages are done, you’ll likely only get one or two extra lives, which will probably vanish within seconds of the next stage anyway.
“On the plus side, the bonus stages LOOK great.”
Admittedly, Battlemaniacs may not be quite as difficult as the original Battletoads, if only because it has fewer levels and because the SNES allowed for more precise movements (which the NES game demanded, but the hardware couldn’t allow). And playing it on Switch Online means you can create save states, which I highly recommend after every frustrating moment (so about every 5 seconds). But being slightly easier than the original Battletoads is like saying walking on hot coals with socks on is slightly more tolerable than walking on hot coals barefoot.
For some reason, people from my generation often look back fondly at Battletoads. I’m assuming it’s probably because the characters reminded us of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, which were all the rage at the time. But actually going back to play this series again is a reminder that some things are best left in the past. Rare would later reach new heights with games like Donkey Kong Country, Goldeneye 007 and Banjo-Kazooie (before they eventually fell into one niche after another when Microsoft bought them out). But Battletoads in Battlemaniacs is not one of those Rare classics. It could have been – it still looks and sounds great, and the tongue-in-cheek nature of the series shines through – if only it weren’t so needlessly vindictive with its difficulty.
Games like Dark Souls are difficult in such a way they make you want to see the challenge through. Battletoads in Battlemaniacs is difficult in a way it makes you just want to play something else instead. And with plenty of other, infinitely better games made by Rare out there, you should do just that.
Hayao Miyazaki’s The Wind Rises was released in US cinemas ten years ago today. On February 21st 2014, what was then to be the legendary animator’s final film made its way to the US, being the last Studio Ghibli film released under Disney (similarly being one of the last films to be released under the ‘Touchstone’ banner before Disney retired the label).
The Wind Rises was sort of a quasi-biopic, telling a (largely fictionalized) story about the life of Jiro Horikoshi, a Japanese WWII airplane designer, and how the looming war would curse Jiro’s pure dreams of wanting to design beautiful flying machines. The film was a unique entry into Miyazaki’s catalogue, as it was the director’s first film since Lupin III: The Castle of Cagliostro to not feature any fantasy or sci-fi elements (though such elements were incredibly scarce in Porco Rosso, with the obvious exception of the main character’s face being magically transformed to that of a pig). But given the more serious subject matter of The Wind Rises, none of the characters perform physics-defying feats as those featured in Cagliostro or Porco Rosso.
That’s not to say that The Wind Rises didn’t feature any of Miyazaki’s fantastic animated wizardry, however. Miyazaki uses the literal idea of Jiro Horikoshi’s dreams to still give the film some surreal elements, as Jiro comes face-to-face with his future inventions and the man who inspired him, Giovanni Battista Caproni.
Like all of Miyazaki’s films, The Wind Rises is nothing short of a visual feast, featuring some of the most captivating hand-drawn animation you will ever see. The hauntingly beautiful images of the film (and the emotional musical score, courtesy of course by the one and only Joe Hisaishi) compliment the underlying melancholy throughout the film. The Wind Rises is a film about love, loss, and how the purity of our dreams can themselves be corrupted.
Miyazaki had previously attempted retirement with Princess Mononoke, before being inspired to create Spirited Away (itself going to be a “one-time return” before Miyazaki stepped back into retirement). Howl’s Moving Castle and Ponyo would follow after that, but with The Wind Rises, Miyazaki seemed to be ready to retire once again. Thankfully for the rest of us, even that retirement didn’t stick (though it did last longer than the director’s previous attempts), as in 2023 Hayao Miyazaki released his latest masterpiece, The Boy and the Heron (known by the more appropriate title ‘How do you Live?’ in its native Japan). Though The Wind Rises didn’t end up being the master filmmaker’s swansong, it would have been a fitting way to wrap up an unparalleled career. It is a most beautiful film.
Mario vs. Donkey Kong on Switch is a remake of the 2004 Game Boy Advance game of the same name, itself a spiritual sequel to the Game Boy version of Donkey Kong (unofficially referred to as “Donkey Kong GB” or “Donkey Kong ’94”) from ten years prior. Mario vs. Donkey Kong utilized gameplay inspired by its Game Boy predecessor (and, in turn, Mario and Donkey Kong’s arcade origins) that lead to a sub-series of its own. Though the Mario vs. Donkey Kong series would gain numerous entries over time, the focus of the games would shift away from its iconic titular characters and onto the “Mini-Mario” toy characters found in the series (later entries would even trade the ‘vs‘ in the title for ‘and,’ further deviating from its origins). So a remake of the 2004 game seems to be a nice reset for the series, and the upgrade to the Nintendo Switch means the game looks and sounds far better than ever. Though fans of the original who were hoping for something a little more may be a little disappointed to know that this remake doesn’t feature a whole lot that the original GBA release didn’t already boast.
The core structure of the game remains the same: Mario still travels across levels that are comprised of two single-screen sections that combine puzzles and platforming. The first half of a stage requires Mario to get a hold of a key and take it to the door to the second half, in which Mario completes the stage by collecting a Mini-Mario toy (Donkey Kong wants a toy for himself, but being a gorilla who doesn’t know how consumerism works, has stolen the entire batch of toys).
Mario is equipped with a different set of acrobatics than normal. In addition to his regular jump, Mario can do a handstand which can lead into a higher jump, with an even higher jump able to be performed after that. Mario’s jump doesn’t hurt enemies here but he can pick up foes when standing on top of them Super Mario Bros. 2-style. Stages will usually feature red, blue and yellow switches, which will operate different mechanics depending on the level, with only one switch being active at a time. Three similarly colored presents are scattered about each stage as well, and players who want one-hundred percent completion will want to grab them all.
“He can handstand, when he needs to…”
The game now boasts eight worlds, as opposed to the original release’s six, with a new toy themed world 4 and ice themed world six joining the original building, jungle, volcano, haunted house, forest and city themed worlds. Each world consists of six standard levels and ends with a Mini-Mario level and a boss fight against DK himself. The Mini-Mario levels change up the structure, with Mario needing to guide the Mini-Marios collected from that world’s previous stages safely to a toybox. Depending on how many Mini-Marios make it to the toybox, Mario will have more health in the boss battle (up to six hit points).
“Kazooie? Is that you?!”
Although the mechanics of the game harken back to the simplistic arcade days of Mario and Donkey Kong’s beginnings, the variety of ideas Nintendo came up with for the puzzles keeps things fresh and interesting throughout. And once all eight worlds have been completed, a second, more difficult campaign opens up in which each world has six new levels which once again mix things up (these stages ditch the two-part levels in favor of singular stages in which Mario has to solve the puzzles with the aid of a single Mini-Mario, who now holds the key to the levels’ exits). It’s a unique idea to fundamentally change how the game works midway through, but it ultimately pays off in giving the game more variety and an overall more fun experience. If only more games would take such a risk.
“The game’s ‘second campaign’ – in which Mario guides a Mini-Mario toy to the exit – brings out the game’s best puzzles.”
The game has, of course, never looked better. The vibrant, cartoony look of the characters and stages look beautiful on the Switch. And the soundtrack, re-recorded with real instruments, is a delight (the game even has the option to listen to its soundtrack right out of the gate, no unlocking required). The Switch may be getting on a bit in years, but you’d never know it based on Mario vs. Donkey Kong.
Aside from the audiovisual overhaul and two additional worlds, another welcome addition to the remake comes in the form of a two-player option, with a second player joining in as Toad. A new ‘casual’ option eliminates the time limit for stages, for those wanting to play the game more leisurely. Though these additions are all welcome (especially the new levels), they may not be enough for those who were hoping for a little more out of the game. Mario vs. Donkey Kong always had a lot of content for a Game Boy Advance title, but for a Nintendo Switch game, you can’t help but feel a few more bells and whistles could have been added.
It’s also worth pointing out that, despite featuring sixteen worlds between the game’s two campaigns, Mario vs. Donkey Kong is still over pretty quickly. While there’s nothing wrong with shorter games (in fact, they can feel like a blessing in this day and age when so many games feel padded to high heaven), the fact that the game doesn’t really get challenging until the last couple of worlds in the second campaign means you’ll breeze through the majority of it. Again, a short and easy game is no unforgiveable sin, but there’s something about this Switch upgrade of Mario vs. Donkey Kong that leaves you wanting more out of it. It’s a loving recreation of a cult favorite GBA title, and a fitting return to form for the Mario vs. Donkey Kong series, but it still doesn’t feel much bigger than the GBA original. Considering Mario vs. Donkey Kong is now a fully priced Switch release, this stings all the more.
Mario vs. Donkey Kong remains a competent and engaging puzzle-platformer that pays homage to the roots of Nintendo’s original hero and villain. It’s the kind of game that’s best enjoyed in small bursts. Though that very nature may have made it ideal for the GBA, it still serves as a fun ‘secondary’ Mario title on the Nintendo Switch.
Today, February 13th 2024, marks the ten-year anniversary of the release of Donkey Kong Country: Tropical Freeze on the Wii U in Japan. Ten years later, and it’s still one of Nintendo’s greatest achievements, one of the best platformers of all time, the best Wii U game, and one of my all-time favorites. It’s also probably the most underrated Nintendo game ever made.
I was elated at E3 2013 when it was announced that Retro Studios were working on a second Donkey Kong Country game. Donkey Kong Country Returns was a brilliant, well, return for the DKC series. Donkey Kong Country has always had a strong place in my heart, and Retro Studios proved they could handle the series just as well as Rare did back in the 1990s. A second DKC from Retro Studios was something I wasn’t expecting but couldn’t have been happier with. Too bad I was in the minority at the time, as most people were upset that Retro Studios wasn’t working on another Metroid game (despite having made three already by that point) or a new Star Fox (which was just a baseless rumor anyway). So yes, the ‘controversy’ around Tropical Freeze could be summed up as “it wasn’t Metroid.” That has to be the dumbest video game controversy of all time (okay, maybe the “Bayonetta dresses differently in Bayonetta 2 so is she even Bayonetta anymore?” controversy is probably a little more dumb). Though going back to 2013, the most recent Metroid game was Other M, one of the worst Nintendo games of all time. Between that or more of what Donkey Kong Country Returns gave us, well, it was a no brainer which one I wanted to see more of.
This non-troversy got so bad that at least one reviewer on a “professional” gaming site gave Tropical Freeze a mixed-to-negative review, seemingly still throwing a tantrum that the game wasn’t Metroid (thankfully, this same site would rectify the sin of this reviewer when Tropical Freeze was re-released on the Switch in 2018, giving it a much more glowing review). Suffice to say, this backlash, combined with the fact the game was released on the ill-fated Wii U, did not work in Tropical Freeze’s favor.
Well, it was their loss. Because Donkey Kong Country: Tropical Freeze surpassed Returns in every way, becoming one of the best platformers of all time in the process. The level design is god-tier, the additional characters in Dixie and Cranky add a new layer to the gameplay, the bosses are among the best in genre history, it was the toughest Nintendo game in decades, and David Wise – the composer of the original SNES DKC trilogy – returned to score a soundtrack that sits comfortably alongside the first two entries in the series as an all-time great. If Returns proved Retro Studios could handle Donkey Kong Country, then Tropical Freeze proved that they’d mastered the series.
On the downside, we haven’t had a new Donkey Kong game since Tropical Freeze. In these past ten years, Tropical Freeze was ported over to the Nintendo Switch, but no follow-ups (or even spinoffs) to Retro Studio’s Donkey Kong series have been released. There have been on-and-off rumors for years now that the team behind Super Mario Odyssey were making a brand new 3D platformer in the Donkey Kong series, but rumors are all they’ve been. A 3D platformer from the team behind Odyssey is a very promising prospect, but I still think another sidescrolling Donkey Kong Country is overdue at this point. After all, the classic DKC series was comprised of a trilogy on the SNES. It seems fitting that Retro Studio’s take on the series get the same treatment (unlikely at this time, seeing as Retro is working on Metroid Prime 4. We’ve come full circle). Though after ten years, us Donkey Kong fans would just like something.
On the upside, Tropical Freeze’s re-release on the Nintendo Switch helped the game finally get (at least some of) the recognition it always deserved. The tepid praise Tropical Freeze received during its initial Wii U run was now a thing of the past. With the wave of “it’s not Metroid” being long past in the rearview mirror, players and critics could now view Tropical Freeze for being what it is. And what it is is one hell of a platformer.
Since its release in February 2014 (the 13th in Japan, 21st in America and Europe, and 22nd in Australia), I don’t think there’s been a 2d/side-scrolling platformer that’s been as good since (Super Mario Bros. Wonder and Sonic Mania probably come the closest). And I think Tropical Freeze was the best 2D/side-scrolling platformer since, well, Donkey Kong Country 2 was released nearly nineteen years beforehand. Tropical Freeze is that good.
If I may even say something a tad controversial, I would go so far as to say Donkey Kong Country Tropical Freeze is the best game Nintendo has made outside of some of the 3D Mario games (and the Super Mario RPG remake) of the past couple of decades (yes, that includes Zelda). It’s just a perfectly put together video game. The real question is why didn’t I score it a 10/10 in my reviews for either the Wii U or Switch version? It, alongside Bloodborne, are probably the two games I could have given a perfect score but for some (stupid) reason didn’t. Perhaps I will go back and up those scores someday, or perhaps I’ll leave the scores as is, to show that we all make mistakes (and that you shouldn’t put all-importance on the little number at the end of a review. My constant gushing over Tropical Freeze says more than any number ever could).
At any rate, while we wait with bated breath for Nintendo to announce a new Donkey Kong game (whether DKC or otherwise), let’s all take time to reflect on a decade of one of Nintendo’s unsung masterpieces.
Happy tenth anniversary, Donkey Kong Country: Tropical Freeze!
Well damn. It’s now time to really feel old, because Mario Party on the Nintendo 64 and, by extension, the entire Mario Party series, turns twenty-five years old today.*
*Based on its US release. I missed acknowledging its Japanese anniversary in December so shoosh!
It was on February 8th 1999 that players first delved into the ‘party’ aspect of the Mushroom Kingdom. Up to four players could compete to get the most stars and coins across various board games and 50 different mini-games. It was a whole lot of fun… Except when your best friend landed on Chance Time and stole all your stars, after all your hard work and blistered palms HOW COULD THEY DO THIS?!
*Ahem!*
Yes, Mario Party, for all its lighthearted fun, has also been humorously dubbed Nintendo’s ‘friendship killer’ due to how it encourages players to mess with each other’s progress, as well as its chance-based elements. But hey, that’s part of the fun.
“Boy, I miss these promotional CG N64 renders…”
Mario Party kickstarted one of the most prolific sub-series within the Mario franchise. The N64 alone saw two sequels, before the GameCube ran wild with the series, the Wii experimented with it, and the series made its way to handhelds. Mario Party is still going strong today, with two entries on the Nintendo Switch (with Mario Party Superstars in particular, taking the series back to glorious basics). You can even play the original N64 entries via Switch’s online service, and relive the fun and frustration all over again.
With the exception of the primary Mario platformers and Mario Kart, Mario Party has perhaps grown a richer history than any other sub-series in the franchise. And it all started on the Nintendo 64, twenty-five years ago today! Wahoo!
Well, now I really feel old. Because here’s one of the earliest games I can remember being super hyped about before release, and it turns thirty years old today. It’s Sonic the Hedgehog 3!
Back in the early 1990s, Sonic the Hedgehog was the coolest guy around (briefly surpassing Mario in popularity). The original 1991 game instantly made the character an icon, but 1992’s Sonic the Hedgehog 2 is the game that elevated the series into something timeless. This put the hype for Sonic the Hedgehog 3 on a whole other level.
Sonic the Hedgehog 3 was going to be the biggest game of its time. It became so big, in fact, that it wasn’t going to meet its planned release date, and the game had to be split in two (the second half of the game, Sonic & Knuckles, was released later in the same year, and featured unique “lock-on technology” to connect it with Sonic 3, and even Sonic 2).
Sonic the Hedgehog 3 was released first in the US on February 2nd of 1994 (Groundhog Day, which Sega dubbed “Hedgehog Day”), and would release in other regions shortly thereafter. The game took everything that made Sonic 2 so good, and expanded on it. More zones, bigger boss fights, the series’ most iconic bonus stages (blue spheres!), an awesome snowboarding section, and the introduction of a rival character for Sonic in the form of Knuckles the Echidna. And for the first time in the series, Sonic 3 featured a save feature (which really does help it stand the test of time above its predecessors). To this day, Sonic the Hedgehog 3 puts up an argument to being the best entry in the beloved series (though Sonic Mania might have something to say about that).
Sega themselves seem to be celebrating the anniversary, making a number of announcements regarding the upcoming 2024 film Sonic the Hedgehog 3, including the return of Jim Carrey as my main man Dr. Ivo Robotnik!
It’s hard to believe it’s been thirty years since that fateful ‘Hedgehog Day’ that gave Sega fans possibly their biggest moment ever. Here’s hoping Sonic can replicate this game’s greatness again in the future.
Happy 30th Anniversary, Sonic the Hedgehog 3! And Happy 30th ‘birthday’ Knuckles!
Illumination Studios has grown into one of the world’s most prominent names in animation, due in no small part to their wildly successful Despicable Me and Minions franchises. Illumination found its greatest success when teaming with Nintendo to create 2023’s The Super Mario Bros. Movie. The follow-up to Illumination’s Nintendo adaptation was a movie about ducks (leading to many a Duck Hunt joke) titled ‘Migration.’
Illumination has often faced criticisms for the simplicity of their pictures, with many feeling the studio’s works are too light in this day and age when mainstream animation – under the influence of Pixar – is more willing than ever to deliver deep, emotional storytelling. Though is it really so terrible that Illumination doesn’t aim so high? The past couple of decades have been a goldmine for cinematic animated artistry, yes. But does that mean everything animated has to strive to be a masterpiece? Sometimes smaller, more lighthearted animated fair is enough. I feel Illumination fills this niche nicely. While Pixar and other contemporaries often aim to create the next animated masterpiece, Illumination serves up simple, harmless entertainments. Rarely standout but never terrible. And Migration once again fills this role, playing as a sort of ‘Finding Nemo Lite.’
Migration tells the story of the Mallards, a family of ducks who have lived a sheltered life in their secluded pond, mainly due to their worried and anxious patriarch, Mack (Kumail Nanjiani). Mack’s wife Pam (Elizabeth Banks) wishes for a more eventful life for the family, especially their two children, Dax (Caspar Jennings) and Gwen (Tresi Gazal). Despite longing for something more, the Mallard family still seem mostly accepting with their safe life, until another family of ducks stops by the pond during their migration to Jamaica. The mallards wish to join the migration, except for Mack, who fears leaving the comfort of his home. Mack eventually changes his mind after a conversation with Uncle Dan (Danny DeVito), and Mack realizes he doesn’t want himself – or his family – to end up like the slovenly uncle. So in the middle of the night, Mack wakes his family (Uncle Dan included) to get an early start and try to catch up with the other ducks on their way to Jamaica. But the migration is anything but simple, with cooky herons, a gang of street pigeons and a sinister chef being just some of the dangers the Mallards will encounter, making Mack question his decision to leave his home.
Like Illumination’s other works, Migration is a very simple movie. As stated, the film echoes similar themes to Finding Nemo (an overly cautious father leaves the comfort of his home and goes on an adventure for the sake of his family), but Migration lacks the Pixar classic’s emotional weight and complexity. Kids will probably love the colorful characters, and while adults may find some enjoyment out of Migration, they probably won’t be shedding any tears like they might for Nemo.
Also like Illumination’s other works, that hardly seems to matter. Migration excels in the usual areas Illumination movies excel at: vibrant, eye-popping animation, fun characters with well-cast voices (I especially like Gwen and Uncle Dan), and lighthearted humor. It also has a surprisingly good musical score. In short: Migration is a fun movie.
Those who are hoping Migration may be the movie that (ironically) gets Illumination out of their comfort zone will be disappointed to know that the film is another safe entry in the studio’s canon (even the studio’s best film, The Super Mario Bros. Movie, was a safe movie that was elevated mostly due to the world and characters Nintendo created, as opposed to what Illumination themselves brought to the table). Those who accept and appreciate Illumination for what it is and the role it fills in today’s world of animation will find a movie that – while maybe nothing special – is undeniably charming and fun. More importantly, kids should really like it.
This has been a long time coming. In the first year of this site, I amassed 100 video game reviews. And about a year and a half after that, I hit 200. I reached the 300 mark after roughly a year after that. That was in 2018.
Sadly, my reviews have slowed down considerably in the years since. There was even a year long period between 2022 and 2023 where I didn’t write a single video game review! For shame.
Suffice to say I have a ton of catching up to do. And I’m hoping in the months ahead, I’ll start cranking out the reviews at a more steady pace again. I have no shortage of games to review in my collection, especially all the ones I need to catch up on from 2020 onward.
But enough about things I need to catch up on in the future, let me give myself a pat on the back for this milestone in the present! Woohoo! 400 video game reviews! Yo Adrian… I did it!
From humble beginnings launching this site on Christmas of 2014 to spending way too much time in front of a TV/computer screen playing these games to today, Wizard Dojo celebrates 400 video game reviews written by yours truly!
…Hey, I don’t have a lot to brag about. Let me have this!
I have a number of additional video game reviews (as well as movie reviews and other stuff) in the pipeline, so hopefully that can give me a head start on making 2024 a more productive year here at Wizard Dojo.
Here’s hoping it won’t take so damn long to reach the next milestone.
Mario has always been gaming’s renaissance man. Whereas most video game series fit into a particular genre and stick with it, Mario has been the vessel with which Nintendo stretches their creative muscle. Not only are the core Mario platformers ever evolving with their ideas, but Mario and his world have found their way into pretty much every genre the medium has to offer. Mario Kart is the most famous of Mario spinoffs, but the mustachioed hero has also found his way into puzzle games, party games, and virtually every sport under the sun. Mario’s versatility was put to its biggest test on the Super Nintendo way back in 1996, however, with the release of Super Mario RPG: Legend of the Seven Stars.
At the time, the story-driven, dialogue-heavy RPG genre seemed as far removed from the instantaneous fun of the Super Mario series as you could get. But Nintendo and Squaresoft (now Square-Enix) made the oddball combination work. And work beautifully.
Though initially conceived as a more traditional RPG in both gameplay and setting by Square (Mario was originally to ride a horse and use a sword), Mario creator Shigeru Miyamoto was intrigued by the concept of the game, but not the direction, and took matters into his own hands as a creative consultant to find a balance between making the game more Mario-esque, while simultaneously making it unlike any Mario game that had come before (or since). The end result is a game that subverted both the RPG genre and the Mario series, and even toyed with gaming conventions themselves. A humorous story filled with oddball characters (even by Mario standards) and completed with an interactive battle system, Super Mario RPG: Legend of the Seven Stars proved to be one of the brightest highlights in a series that has never had a shortage of highlights.
Sadly, despite winning critical acclaim and becoming one of the most beloved Mario games and RPGs of all time, Super Mario RPG: Legend of the Seven Stars proved to be a one and done. With Square and Nintendo going their separate ways shortly after the release of Super Mario RPG, everything that the game brought to the Mario series seemed locked in that moment in time, never to be revisited. Though the game’s DNA can be felt in its spiritual successors Paper Mario and Mario & Luigi (and the many indie RPGs it inspired, such as Undertale), Super Mario RPG is one of the exceedingly rare Mario games to never get a sequel. And with Square bizarrely getting the rights to the unique characters and elements Super Mario RPG brought into the Mario universe, they seemed destined to obscurity. Fans have begged Nintendo to include the character “Geno” in Super Smash Bros. for two decades now, only for their wishes to go ignored by willingly deaf ears.
After twenty-seven years and repeated disappointments, fans of the beloved RPG had understandably given up hope that Nintendo and Square would ever remember Super Mario RPG. That is until that fateful morning in June 2023, when during a Nintendo Direct, Nintendo revealed a full-blown remake of Super Mario RPG for the Nintendo Switch, an announcement that brought many fans to tears (myself very much included). Released on November 17th 2023, the Super Mario RPG remake proved to be everything fans could’ve hoped for and more. It’s the same Super Mario RPG we know and love (sans the “Legend of the Seven Stars” subtitle), only it looks and sounds better than ever, and even includes a few meaningful gameplay additions and tweaks to make this classic feel even more timeless.
The story begins the same as it always does, with Bowser absconding with Princess Peach, and Mario setting out to rescue her. Mario immediately finds himself in Bowser’s Castle (referred to here as “Bowser’s Keep”), instantly letting the player know something is different. Just as Mario defeats Bowser and is about to rescue the princess, a massive sword descends from the sky and plunges into Bowser’s Keep, resulting in a tremendous earthquake that sends the trio of Mario, Bowser and Peach into different regions of the Mushroom Kingdom.
It turns out the giant sword is “Exor,” a servant of an evil blacksmith from another world named “Smithy.” The Smithy gang – an assortment of anthropomorphic weapons created by Smithy – plan to take over Mario’s world. After the Smithy Gang take over the castle and Bowser’s army, Exor destroys the path to Bowser’s Keep, meaning Mario will have to journey across the world to find entry into the castle. Things are even more dire than Mario realizes, however, as during its descent into Mario’s world, Exor slashed through the Star Road, shattering it into seven Star Pieces. The Star Road, it turns out, is where people’s wishes go in order to be granted. With the Star Road broken, people’s wishes can’t come true.
Luckily for Mario, he won’t be alone, as he gains four valuable allies during his adventure. Princess Peach and even Bowser himself join Mario’s team, alongside two characters unique to Super Mario RPG: Mallow and Geno. Mallow is a cute and fluffy fellow who believes himself to be a frog. He possesses powerful weather-based magic and wants to become brave like Mario. Geno is an otherworldly being on a mission to repair the Star Road, taking possession of the body of a doll which makes him something of a cross between Gandalf and Buzz Lightyear. So Mario and his friends (and Bowser) go on an adventure to recover the seven Star Pieces in order to repair Star Road so people’s wishes can come true, before the Smithy Gang can get control of them to make Smithy’s dark desires a reality.
Super Mario RPG was the first story-heavy Mario game, and appropriately, it’s as charming as video game stories get. Though Mario is his usual, silent protagonist self, the game brings out so much personality (and humor) from its characters, both new and returning. Princess Peach wants to prove herself a hero, tired of being in the damsel-in-distress role. Bowser’s personality as a self-conscious, insecure bully (depicted heavily in The Super Mario Bros. Movie) was first developed here. Mallow is the sensitive kid who wants to prove he’s not a crybaby. And Geno is the sagely mentor guiding everyone through the journey. Along the way, you’ll encounter a parade of quirky characters both good and evil, from wise old frogs to would-be gangster crocodiles to a hairy, beetle-obsessed manchild named Booster. Even the Smithy Gang are mostly a bunch of weirdos. For the first time ever, Super Mario RPG gave players a peak behind the curtain of the Mushroom Kingdom and gave gaming’s best series a fairytale story to go with it.
Of course, when it comes to old school, turn-based RPGs, the genre was mainly comprised of two halves: the story, and the battle system. And much like Super Mario RPG injected a unique dose of personality and humor into its story, it similarly subverted the traditional RPG battle system with Action Commands, one of gaming’s more subtle innovations which brought the RPG genre up to pace with the action of the Super Mario series.
Preparing your characters for battle is much simpler than most RPGs. Instead of a host of equipment to keep track of, each character simply has a weapon (for attack), armor (for defense) and an accessory (which grant various bonuses). Each character has hit points, while they share a collective pool of “Flower Points” (used for special attacks). Gain enough experience points and you level up, where players can further boost a character’s hit points, physical attack and defense, or magic attack and defense (now accompanied by the best victory screen in gaming). It’s a simple format that hides a lot of depth.
While typical RPGs of the 90s saw players simply select moves and items from a menu and watch the action play out, Super Mario RPG made its battle system more interactive through Action Commands, timed button presses that, if performed correctly, make Mario and friends’ attacks stronger and reduce the damage inflicted by enemies when on the defensive. Most attacks see the player time a button press just before making a hit, while others may involve button-mashing, twirling the control stick, or holding a button and letting go at the right second. It may sound like a small bit of interactivity injected into the genre, but it ultimately made a world of difference in making Super Mario RPG more fun (and timeless) to its contemporaries.
The battle system has even been improved in this Nintendo Switch remake with a few new mechanics added into the mix. Notably, performing an Action Command correctly will cause splash damage to the other enemies on the battlefield, in addition to building up a new meter. When filled, this meter allows the player to perform brand new Triple Moves, a kind of super attack that changes depending on which three party members the player is currently using (complete with cinematic flair). These new inclusions add a whole new layer to the battle system, making it even more fun than ever before.
“Mario, Peach and Geno’s Triple Move protects each member of the party from the next attack, no matter how powerful.”
Another seemingly small (but actually quite big) change comes in the ability to swap party members mid-fight. Though you can still only use three of the five characters at a given time, and Mario must always be present as in the original, you can now swap the other two party members out at any time. This is a very important change that means the player can now alter battle strategies as necessary, instead of being locked into the team you went into battle with.
Other, smaller changes have been made, such as each party member providing a passive bonus when in the active team (Mallow provides a boost to magic attacks, while Bowser increases physical defense, and so on). The battle system of the Super Mario RPG remake should be seen as a perfect example of how to update a classic, while still retaining what made it special to begin with. The same could be said for the game as a whole, as everything fans loved about the original is still intact, but with those little added bits and pieces to make things a little more accessible to modern audiences. Players can now revisit previous locations via the pause menu instead of having to backtrack an area and traversing the world map. Players can hold more items, and there’s even a storage box present for excess items. And now there are clearer visual cues for when to perform Action Commands. Things of that nature.
Additional changes are simply done for the love of the game, such as the inclusion of an in-game journal (where Mallow and Geno log the events of their adventure) and a monster list that includes every monster Mario and company encounter, complete with their statistics, animations and ever-humorous descriptions. Additions such as these weren’t necessary, but infinitely appreciated. They’re a gift to the fans.
Another element that set Super Mario RPG apart from other RPGs of its day were the barrage of mini-games featured in the adventure. While RPGs often have sidequests, they tended to feature more of the same gameplay, but Super Mario RPG is constantly throwing fun mini-games the player’s way, each of which changing up the gameplay throughout Mario’s quest. The infamous Yoshi racing mini-game makes a return (now with those aforementioned visual cues to ease things a bit), the mine kart ride, composing music with tadpoles, and the trip through a river which looks like something out of Disneyland are all left beautifully intact. The best Mario games are the ones that are constantly introducing fun ideas up to the very end, and the transition to the RPG genre didn’t get in the way of that mentality. Super Mario RPG remains one of the most varied Mario games of all time. It’s as much a variety show as it is an RPG masterpiece.
The game has, naturally, been rebuilt from the ground-up. Though everything remains in place from where it was back in 1996, the game looks beautifully up-to-date for the Nintendo Switch. The isometric overworld and its locales are still as dreamlike as ever, but now with modernized graphics, a wider range of color, and some truly stunning lighting. You’d never know Super Mario RPG were a remake just from looking at it. It’s one of the best-looking games on the Nintendo Switch. It’s a gorgeous game.
One of the most iconic elements of Super Mario RPG has always been its musical score, composed by Yoko Shimomura (composer of Street Fighter II and Kingdom Hearts, among others). The soundtrack has always been one of the most beloved in not just the Mario series, but in gaming as a whole (personally, I may place it second of all time, behind only Donkey Kong Country 2’s soundtrack). Much like the visuals, the music of Super Mario RPG has been made anew. All the iconic themes are still intact, only now with the advantage of a full orchestra and big band instruments. From the merry music of the Mushroom Kingdom to the dastardly themes of the Smithy Gang and everything in between, the soundtrack to Super Mario RPG soars even higher than ever. It’s Yoko Shimomura’s best work, made even better. And if you happen to be feeling nostalgic for all the tunes in their original form, players have the option of switching to the classic soundtrack at any time. It’s a win/win.
“A-Aurora borealis?! At this time of year, at this time of day, in this part of the Mushroom Kingdom, localized entirely in Belome’s Temple?!”
Another fun little detail is that, while the graphics and music have been updated, the majority of sound effects are the same as they were on the Super Nintendo (Bowser’s laugh and Yoshi’s more modern sounds are the exceptions). Super Mario RPG was always one of those games with sound effects that were distinct to itself, and something would have felt off if they were changed here. So to have the classic sound effects alongside modernized visuals and music was a perfect way to blend the old alongside the new.
This is everything a remake of a classic should be. Super Mario RPG on Nintendo Switch is the same game we all know and love, but it has never looked, sounded or played better. It’s one of the most legendary Mario games and RPGs brought to a whole new level (there’s even a host of post-game bosses, new to the remake, waiting for those who complete the main adventure). It’s somehow both a remake of the original game, and a love letter to it.
Super Mario RPG on Nintendo Switch feels like a dream. The one Mario game we thought would never really be acknowledged again, brought back in full force. It felt like such an impossibility for so long, that it often felt surreal simply playing through it. It’s a pitch perfect remake of one of Nintendo’s all-time greatest achievements. Aside from a few name changes to a handful of characters and items, it’s the same beautifully weird and timeless adventure we’ve always loved. Twenty-seven years later, it’s still gaming’s greatest fairy tale, one of the funniest and most charming video games ever made, and the closest thing to playing a Disney movie. Now maybe Nintendo and Square can finally get to work on a sequel! Okay, one miracle at a time…
It may no longer boast the subtitle of “Legend of the Seven Stars.” But Super Mario RPG on the Nintendo Switch is still, quite simply, a legend.
… Oops! I mean… Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays, everybody! I hope your day is filled with love and joy! You deserve a big smooch!
Before we begin the festivities, I’d like to wish everyone a very happy holiday!
Merry Christmas!
Happy Hanukkah!
Happy Kwanzaa!
Happy Festivus!
Happy everybody!
Whatever holiday(s) you celebrate, I hope you have a great one, you sly fox, you! And here’s to a happy 2024! May the new year bring you happiness, and may it make me more consistent with writing my reviews and whatnot.
Speaking of my writing, Christmas Day also marks the anniversary of this site! Yeah, Christmas Day 2014, to be exact! Geez, we’ve hit the ninth anniversary already… I’m really going to have to try and go big for next year’s big one-oh.
So Happy Holidays, Happy Wizard Dojo, and Good Moleman to you!
Now then, let’s not dillydally any longer. Let us begin this Christmas special!
My Top 10 Movies of 2023
2023 has proven to be a stacked year for cinema. Whether big budget, small budget, mainstream, artsy, indie, foreign, or some other category, 2023 was like a treasure trove of movies in a lot of ways.
While I normally like to write my favorite film(s) of the year list as its own post here, this time I figured I’d add it to my annual Christmas Special and see how it goes. Besides, for various reasons I rarely end up making my best films of the year post until well into the next year, long after most people would care to read it. At least this time I’m timely.
Again, there was no shortage of great movies in 2023, but I feel my list of the year’s best may differ somewhat from most peoples. Sure, I’ve mostly selected some popular choices, but popular in that they were popular with general audience as well as some for the more artsy crowd. Though some of those same artsy folk would surely form an angry mob at the sight of my list, as there’s no Killers of the Flower Moon (lord knows as much as they hate fans of popular movies, the “cinema crowd” are also basically fanboys for Martin Scorsese). Flower Moon is a great film in many respects. Just not one of my best of the year (it loses some additional points for Scorsese’s shoehorned cameo in the end, which is presented in such a way it feels like the movie expects us to be in awe at the director’s on-screen presence). Also of note, there’s no Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse on my list. Again, mostly great, but it feels like it’s its own biggest fan. And there are still a handful of 2023 movies I still need to see (I can always revise the list later, if need be).
My list contains films which I think are either A) artful but lacking in the self-indulgence of the above mentioned films, and B) movies that were pure fun. Because I’m a human being and not a robot, I like fun.
Chances are you may disagree with my list, either through some of the entries or their placements. But what are you gonna do about it? It’s my list! Here I am all powerful! Mwahahahaha!
*Ahem!*
Maybe… Maybe we should just get to the list now…
10:Guardians of the Galaxy: Volume 3
The Marvel Cinematic Universe is not what it once was. While the crossover mega-franchise may have once guaranteed a good time (of varying degrees), it seemed like once everything up to that point had been wrapped up with Avengers: Endgame, the MCU lost all sense of direction. Even the aspects we used to like about the individual films no longer worked in the post-Endgame MCU. The MCU movies now feel more contrived as they go through the motions, desperately trying to setup the next big crossover event (which still hasn’t even happened yet).
Guardians of the Galaxy: Volume 3 felt like a fun return to form. If even just a one-time return to form. It has all the usual trappings that used to make the MCU so consistently entertaining, but importantly (and uniquely, in the MCU), Guardians of the Galaxy: Volume 3 actually had something to say.
Surprisingly, Guardians 3 shifted the focus from Peter Quill to Rocket, and with a good reason: the movie is all about the beauty of animals, and the empathy we should have for them. As an animal lover myself, I definitely had to appreciate that. It’s the only Marvel movie to ever make me teary-eyed.
9: John Wick: Chapter 4
The John Wick series has long-since elevated fight-oriented action films, and the fourth (final?) entry takes things to all new, ludicrous heights. At nearly three hours long, it may sound bloated on paper, but because the spectacular action the series is known for is on full display – and just never lets up – it’s three hours in which there’s never a dull moment.
Perhaps the “chapter 4” in the title does the film a disservice. Yes, it is the fourth John Wick movie, but it’s on such a grander scale than those that came before it (and not just because of the runtime), and so much happens throughout the movie, that it’s more of its own saga than a mere “chapter” in the series.
It takes a truly competent film to feature so much non-stop action (in the most literal sense. It doesn’t let up!) for nearly three hours and never feel exhausting. But John Wick: Chapter 4 more than lives up to the challenge. I’m sure the franchise will continue in various different guises and forms. But if Chapter 4 is the sendoff of John Wick proper, it’s a hell of a way to go out.
8: Mission: Impossible – Dead Reckoning Part One
Speaking of a franchise that elevates action, what Jon Wick did for fight choreography, Mission: Impossible has done for stunt work and larger-than-life set pieces. And the seventh installment in the series, Mission: Impossible – Dead Reckoning Part One raises the bar once again. It’s as entertaining as its title is a mouthful.
Honestly, how many franchises can say they’re still running at full steam by their seventh installment? I’m seriously struggling to think if any other movie series has been as consistent as Mission: Impossible. Sure, the second installment is a bit of a black sheep, but so what when the rest of the series only got better and better after that? The series’ reliability is as impressive as the death-defying situations Ethan Hunt constantly gets swept up in.
With Dead Reckoning Part Two still on the horizon, there’s at least one more globe-trotting espionage adventure for Ethan Hunt and company to partake in. But I have to admit, Dead Reckoning Part One sets the standard for stunts and set pieces so high, it may be difficult even for future Mission: Impossibles to top.
7: Barbie
Barbie may be the weirdest movie phenomenon of the last few decades. A film based on a toyline that has some insightful things to say, with a tongue-in-cheek tone, and a bit of surrealist world-building doesn’t sound like the usual billion-dollar movie. Yet somehow, Barbie worked. And worked well, becoming the highest-grossing film of the year, and being one half of the duel phenomenon of “Barbenheimer” alongside its unlikely “sister film,” Oppenheimer.
Though I greatly enjoyed Barbie, I would like to take a quick moment to point out my one big complaint with the movie (seeing as I’ve been meaning to write a proper review of it, but still haven’t gotten to it yet): I don’t think it’s really a kids’ movie. That’s not to say that it’s inappropriate (aside from the occasional adult joke, but that’s nothing new in children’s media), just that I don’t think it has much in the way for kids to enjoy outside of the bright colors, which seems like an arrogant oversight by the filmmakers. As someone who has seen many children’s films that have more than enough depth and intelligence for adults, it is a shame that one of the most acclaimed “children’s films” in recent memory is essentially a movie made for adults that just happens to be based off a children’s toyline.
Did that sound too negative? Well, Barbie made it onto my list, and at number 7. So obviously I do think highly of it. But I have been meaning to get that complaint off my chest for a while. And it is that one element that prevents me from placing Barbie even higher up on this list.
Even still, Barbie is a fun and intelligent movie that’s all too easy to enjoy. It may even be the start of a whole new type of blockbuster.
6: Oppenheimer
The other half of ‘Barbenheimer.’
Though the biopic is a genre that really ran its course throughout the 2010s, Oppenheimer proves that great filmmaking equals a great film, even in an oversaturated genre. Christopher Nolan is at the top of his game here, making what I think is the director’s best film since The Dark Knight.
The acting, directing and music of Oppenheimer really make the film feel tense throughout. Even in its humbler moments, it still builds that tension so well because you know the horror the film is ultimately leading up to. And appropriately, it dissolves into tragedy once all is said and done.
5: Godzilla Minus One
Godzilla: Minus One puts up a good argument to being the best Godzilla film ever made. It goes back to the roots of the series (Godzilla being a metaphor for atomic devastation, a critique on Japan’s government, etc.), but it adds the theme of finding appreciation and beauty in life itself, even in the face of pure, absolute devastation.
Minus One checks all the boxes for a great Godzilla movie, but perhaps even more impressively, it works wonderfully even if you’re someone who’s not overly familiar with the King of the Monsters. It’s simply a gripping film from start to finish. And amidst all the chaos and destruction seen on-screen, it ultimately proves to be (perhaps surprisingly) one of the most life-affirming films in recent memory. It’s a beautiful film.
It’s also the best Jaws sequel.
4: The Super Mario Bros. Movie
As soon as I saw The Super Mario Bros. Movie, it was always going to appear highly on my year-end list. No, I don’t give a damn that it isn’t a critical darling. We live in a time in which movie critics like movies that are tailor made to pander to movie critics. So critical approval means nothing to me. What the Super Mario Bros. Movie is, however, is fun. Pure, unbridled fun. And that should account for something.
I firmly believe the Super Mario Bros. franchise to be the best franchise in all of popular culture. No other series has so consistently delivered, defined and redefined its medium in the way Super Mario has for video games. And while the franchise’s jump to the big screen may not be as masterful as a film as many of its games are as games, it is still the single most fun video game to movie adaptation I can recall seeing.
Yes, the movie is basically fan-service. But you know what? Is that really so bad in this case? It’s an adaptation! When so many video game movies have felt embarrassed by their source material, it’s kind of nice to see The Super Mario Bros. Movie basically serve as a love letter to the game series.
Of all the movies released in 2023, this is the one I see myself going back to and watching the most. Let’s not pretend that fun doesn’t matter.
3: Tetris
From a movie based on a video game to a movie about a video game.
Tetris is the true-but-embellished story about the struggle of getting Alexey Pajitnov’s indelible falling-block puzzle game out of the USSR to be played and appreciated around the world. While video game distribution may not sound too exciting, the true story behind Tetris’ distribution has always been a fascinating tale, and the movie adds a chase sequence or two for good measure.
The story of how political and corporate corruption on both sides of the world made the simple distribution of a video game seem impossible, but the wills and determination of a few select people managed to overcome the odds is truly inspiring. The fact that Tetris has essentially become the most accomplished video game in history makes it all the more so.
It may seem like an odd little tale, but Tetris – even with a few added bells and whistles – tells its story with such enthusiasm, that it becomes one of the most engrossing and entertaining films of the year.
2: Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves
Between The Super Mario Bros. Movie and Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves, 2023 was like the year of redeeming game franchises from past cinematic adaptations. Much like the fun of 2023’s Mario outing helped fans recover from the live-action fever dream from thirty years prior, Honor Among Thieves washed away the horrendous stank of the 2000 D&D movie, and provided a thoroughly entertaining movie for both fans of the franchise and people who wouldn’t have the tiniest shred of interest in it otherwise.
In a weird way, I might call Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves as the best Pixar film of the year. Although it has no association with the great animation studio, it has all the hallmarks of a Pixar movie: it stars a cast of lovable, sometimes quirky characters. It’s set in a fantastical world. It has a good sense of humor, but is never self-deprecating or cynical. And it features some genuinely touching moments. In a year when Pixar released what can be described as its “okay-est” film in Elemental, a Dungeons & Dragons movie (of all things) filled the studio’s usual role quite nicely.
Whether you’re a longtime D&D fan or couldn’t care less for the tabletop RPG, Honor Among Thieves works as a great movie for all audiences.
What an absolute delight.
1: The Boy and the Heron
The legendary Hayao Miyazaki’s latest animated dreamscape, The Boy and the Heron, is nothing short of a masterpiece. And the best film of 2023.
The Boy and the Heron (know in Japan by the much more fitting title ‘How do you Live?’) is Miyazaki’s most personal film to date, playing as a sort of quasi-autobiography and reflection of his filmography. It’s a story of grief and its continued effects, and even a film about creativity itself. It may very well be Miyazaki’s most open-ended movie, leaving many of its elements up for interpretation.
After the death of his mother in a WWII bombing, young Mahito crosses paths with the gray heron that dwells around his new home. But this heron turns out to be an otherworldly figure, who guides Mahito to a world between life and death. It’s difficult to describe the film in more detail, because the film – like much of Miyazaki’s work – is often indescribable.
Beyond the metaphorical artistry of it, The Boy and the Heron is also an astoundingly beautiful parade of hand-drawn images. It’s one of the most stunning animated films ever made. Completed, of course, by the audial wizardry of Joe Hisaishi’s haunting score.
It was ten years ago that Hayao Miyazaki released The Wind Rises which – like Princess Mononoke and Spirited Away before it – was supposed to be Miyazaki’s final film. His retirement may have lasted a bit longer this time around, but the wait was more than worth it. The Boy and the Heron is the return of the world’s greatest animator in full force.
The Boy and the Heron is, quite simply, the best film of 2023.
Farewell to E3
Earlier this month, the Entertainment Software Association announced that E3 – the Electronic Entertainment Expo – was officially retired. Though this had been expected, given the dwindling yearly events in the years before the pandemic brought the expo to a complete halt. The ESA attempted to start the event back up as the world began operating again, but to no avail. And so, what was considered the biggest event on the gaming calendar from 1995 to 2019, has come to an end.
Though the official announcement wasn’t all that surprising at this point, it stings all the same now that it’s a reality. For over two decades, E3 was the time when every publisher and developer would bring out all the stops with their major announcements, reveals, trailers, everything! It was like a holiday to those who loved video games, even if it was a trade event. These days, those in the industry wait for those godawful Game Awards to showcase their trailers (which means people wisely just watch the trailers online and skip the actual show, whereas people actively wanted to watch an entire E3 presentation).
So many games and consoles were first showcased at E3, whether just in seconds-long teaser trailers or through game demos on the show floor. The very nature of games turned what was technically a business expo into something fun and exciting for those watching at home, and even those in the business in attendance. For the event’s final few years starting in 2017, E3 even became available for public attendance!
I personally found myself lucky enough to attend E3 from 2009 to 2014, and again in 2017 and 2018, creating many fun and beautiful memories for myself. Even the less-pleasant memories, like my first time playing what would become one of the worst Nintendo games ever in Metroid: Other M now bring a nostalgic tear to my eye.
As a final salute to “the Big Dance” (press ‘F‘ to pay respects), I’m going to list my favorite game (and a runner-up) I played on the showfloor, and a standout memory for every year I attended the event.
2009
“The year Project Natal (later Microsoft Kinect) was all over the place”
Favorite Game on the Show Floor: Batman: Arkham Asylum
To this day, I remember the setup for the Batman: Arkham Asylum booth at E3 2009. It was designed to look like a grungy (edgelord-y?) jail cell, complete with Joker’s usual “hahahaha” scribblings all over the walls. The game itself was great, of course. Today, it’s often considered one of the best super hero games ever made (though its sequel, Arkham City, usually takes top honors… even if its plot ultimately makes no sense. But that’s a rant for another day). Arkham Asylum really made the player feel like Batman. And well, how can you go wrong with that?
Runner-up: New Super Mario Bros. Wii
Honorary mention goes to Left 4 Dead 2, but there’s no way I couldn’t mention New Super Mario Bros. Wii. It was my most played game at my first E3! Nintendo had so many booths playing it, it was ridiculous! I even said hi to Charles Martinet for the first time! It may seem commonplace now, but back then, four-player sidescrolling Mario was a big deal! And so much fun.
Standout Memory: The Super Mario Galaxy 2 Reveal
“The first image of Super Mario Galaxy 2 I ever saw.”
2007’s Super Mario Galaxy on the Wii was already one of the best games ever made. Then, in a move that was unprecedented at the time, Nintendo announced a direct sequel to a 3D Mario game at E3 2009. It was never actually playable on the show floor, but I distinctly remember seeing the above image in a small news sheet being handed out at the event. Being only able to attend the show floor (as opposed to the conferences), looking at this image as I entered the hall doors only to be greeted by a big screen with the trailer itself starting up as soon as I reached Nintendo’s booth was simply magical. A perfect first impression for what would be a perfect game.
2010
“The Wii’s best year.”
Favorite Game on the Show Floor: Donkey Kong Country Returns
If you know me, you know I love – I mean like REALLY LOVE – Donkey Kong Country (particularly the second entry). Keeping in mind again that I didn’t attend the conferences ahead of time, what a hell of a surprise it was to walk into the West Hall of the Los Angeles Convention Center and see the words “Donkey Kong Country Returns” decorating the Nintendo booth! The game itself did not disappoint (even if it would be bettered by its sequel. More on that in a moment). DKCR is still a masterclass in level design.
Runner-up: Kirby’s Epic Yarn
If the very concept of “charm” became a video game, it would most likely be Kirby’s Epic Yarn. Setting aside Kirby’s usual copy abilities in favor of a yarn aesthetic that also found its way into gameplay, Kirby’s Epic Yarn remains one of Kirby’s cutest, and best, adventures yet.
Standout Memory: The 3DS
2010 was a great year to be a Nintendo fan. Not only did Super Mario Galaxy 2 release that year (before E3, leaving the game destined to never actually appear on the show floor), and not only did the Wii see the aforementioned Donkey Kong Country Returns and Kirby’s Epic Yarn (alongside other big titles like Monster Hunter 3 Tri and Tatsunoko vs. Capcom), but it was the year the Nintendo 3DS was revealed. The beautiful little gem always had an uphill battle, coming off the heels of the money-printing Nintendo DS and capitalizing on the 3D craze of the late-2000s/early-2010s. But in the end, the 3DS was a wonderful little handheld that ended up lasting nine years on the market before being discontinued (among the longest of any Nintendo system). And I, and many others, got our first play of it here at E3 2010. *Sniff*
2011
“Remember when Wii U was called Project Cafe?”
Favorite Game on the Show Floor: Dark Souls
By now, the impact and influence of Dark Souls is so deeply ingrained in video games that it can be difficult to remember a time before it. Back at E3 2011, the “Demon’s Souls sequel” was showcased. At the time, I hadn’t played Demon’s Souls, but my brother and others I know raved about it, so I made it a point to check out Dark Souls and WHOAMIGOSH DID A GIANT ARMORED BOAR JUST BREAK ME IN HALF?! Thus was my first experience with Dark Souls.
Runner-up: The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time 3D
I could go with The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword here. After all, it was the big new Zelda game coming out later in 2011 for the Nintendo Wii. And I do have some fond memories of it, and my brief time playing it at E3 (hot take: Skyward Sword started a trend that would continue with the Wii U HD remasters of making cycling through Link’s arsenal much less arduous, all thanks to motion controls!). But I’m going to cheat and go with the 3DS remake of Ocarina of Time. It’s a classic, and it never looked (and maybe even played) better than it did on the 3DS.
On that note, I better give an honorable mention to Star Fox 64 3D. Man, those early days of the 3DS sure were kind to Nintendo 64 remasters.
Standout Memory: Honestly, basically the whole show floor
Since I already referred to my first exposure to Dark Souls, I’m going to cheat here, because the show floor of E3 2011 had so much to offer it all still stands out. From the aforementioned “You Died” of Dark Souls and 3DS N64 remakes, there were also a bunch of indie titles such as Bastion at the show, Batman: Arkham City was on-hand, Kinect was still a thing (pictured above is Sesame Street: Once Upon a Monster, one of the more fondly remembered Kinect titles), and the Wii U – then known as Project Cafe – was on the horizon. Honestly, 2011 as a whole seems to go underrated as an all-time great year for video games.
2012
“Remake Nintendo Land, you cowards!”
Favorite Game on the Show Floor: Ni No Kuni: Wrath of the White Witch
A Studio Ghibli video game?! Hot damn! Count me in!
Ni No Kuni: Wrath of the White Witch looked to emulate the world’s greatest animation studio by… actually getting the world’s greatest animation studio to help make the game. An enhanced remake of a Japan-exclusive Nintendo DS game from two years prior, the PS3 upgrade remains one of the most whimsical and heartfelt video game stories out there. And with gameplay that essentially combines Dragon Quest and Pokémon, it was destined to be a surefire winner. Oh, and Namco Bandai actually got Joe Hisaishi himself to do the music! *Drools Homer Simpson style*
Runner-up: Pikmin 3
With all due respect to Dishonored (which may have been the best game actually released in 2012, with my selections here ultimately releasing in 2013), there was no way I’d deny Pikmin 3 a mention here. Like Donkey Kong Country, I LOVE Pikmin. And the wait from Pikmin 2 to Pikmin 3 was nearly a decade, with nine years between them (a trend Nintendo doubled down on with the next installment, as Pikmin 4 was released a full decade after 3). Though Nintendo Land and New Super Mario Bros. U gave the Wii U some solid launch titles, Pikmin 3 was the game that proved the Wii U was capable of true greatness. And how could you not love the little Rock Pikmin?
Standout Memory: The Wii U and Nintendo Land
The Wii U may have been an ill-fated console, wedged between the cultural phenomenon of the Wii and Switch and always lacking a proper identity unto itself, but it really did give us a lot to love. Some of my favorite E3 memories (and some of my favorite gaming memories of that time period) was the indefinable wackiness of those early months of the Wii U. At E3, I got to play a slew of games for the console, including The Wonderful 101 (then known as ‘Project P-100’) a game I could never really figure out even then, New Super Mario Bros. U (like the Wii game, but with better level design), the aforementioned Pikmin 3 (Mmm-mmm!), Game & Wario (like WarioWare, but not as good), ZombiU (a zombie game, on Wii U!) and Rayman Legends (a fun game). And then there was Nintendo Land, a collection of mini-games based on Nintendo’s franchises that was looking to be the new Wii Sports. I’ll never forget the simple, pure fun I had with different groups of strangers playing the Luigi’s Mansion and Animal Crossing mini-games. Nor will I forget my confusion trying to figure out the Donkey Kong mini-game. Come on Nintendo, give Nintendo Land another chance!
2013
“The times, they were a-changin’!”
Favorite Game on the Show Floor: Donkey Kong Country: Tropical Freeze
There’s a lot to be said about the Wii U, but its 2014 was unquestionably a great year. And pretty much everything that made Wii U’s 2014 so great was introduced at E3 2013 (the first year Nintendo went with their “Digital Event” approach to the show)! We had Super Smash Bros! We had Bayonetta 2! We had Mario Kart 8! We had Wind Waker HD (although that one actually was released in 2013)! And then we had Donkey Kong Country: Tropical Freeze! As great of a return as Donkey Kong Country Returns was for the DKC series, Tropical Freeze was still somehow a vast improvement in every way. The level design is god-tier. It brought back Dixie Kong and introduced Cranky Kong into the playable character fold. And in one of gaming’s quieter most triumphant moments, it brought back series composer David Wise to score the music (after Returns simply remixed most of his tunes from the first game). One of gaming’s all-time best soundtracks (just like the first two entries in the series), one of the best platformers ever made. And yes, the most underrated Nintendo game ever. It’s been almost a decade since it was released. It’s time we acknowledge Donkey Kong Country: Tropical Freeze as the masterpiece it is. We’re also overdue for a new DK game to boot!
Runner-up: Super Mario 3D World
Honorable mention goes to Mario Kart 8 (again, this was the Wii U’s time to shine), which may be the biggest success story to come out of the Wii U (by some margin), but one that I didn’t have the best first impression with (I was using the gamepad while the other players at E3 were using Wii wheels, I wasn’t aware I was supposed to be using motion controls on the Gamepad and, well, I immediately crashed into a wall). But Super Mario 3D World had a much better first impression for me. Although it wasn’t the genre redefining epic like Super Mario Galaxy that we’d hoped for, 3D World was pure Mario fun. It’s like Super Mario Bros. 3 or World but in the third dimension, and up to four players. Given that I’ve rarely had the chance to play the game with others since, these early 3D World memories stand out all the more (including one level I played were some Try Hard was trying to rush through the level and leave his team behind, but I still reached the flag pole first and got the highest score. Serves him right for not being a team player).
Standout Memory: New Stuff! New Stuff everywhere!
I know I’m going on about the Wii U’s great year (let it have that!), but this was also the year Sony unveiled the Playstation 4 (hey, if the name ain’t broke, don’t fix it) and Microsoft revealed the XBox One (fix the name! Fix the name!). So not only did I have a wave of new Nintendo games to try out, but also whole new consoles?! Man, what a time this was! I can distinctly remember playing Octodad: Dadliest Catch on PS4, and laughing out loud at the absurdity of it. I played some of the Castle of Illusion Starring Mickey Mouse and DuckTales remakes. I played a little Disney Infinity (remember Toys-to-life games?), Batman: Arkham Origins (the “other” Arkham game), Puppeteer, Dark Souls II… What a lovely year this was.
2014
“I won me some t-shirts!”
Favorite Game on the Show Floor: Super Smash Bros. for Wii U
I tried going a different route with my pick for this year, both because I’ve listed a number of Nintendo games here already (and will again in a moment) and because Smash Wii U/3DS and later Smash Ultimate would eventually lead to me losing interest in the series (there’s only so many anime swordfighters I can stands, ’til I can’t stands no more!). But reflecting back on that moment in time, and looking back at what games were present, Super Smash Bros. for Wii U was the only one I could have picked (Bloodborne only had a trailer, it wasn’t on the show floor). The excitement I had for Mega Man’s inclusion (one of the last third-party characters whose inclusion actually made sense), Rosalina being a unique pick from the Mario lineup, the fact that this was a new Super Smash Bros. in a time when the series was still actually about Nintendo… It was a fun moment in time. And best of all, because I kicked so much ass, I won like seven or eight t-shirts (a couple of which I still own, the others I gave away to friends). So that was cool.
Runner-up: Splatoon
I remember when Splatoon was first revealed, it was such a big deal. People couldn’t get over how it was Nintendo’s “first new IP in over a decade,” which was actually a blatantly false narrative, as series like Wii Sports, Wii Fit, Brain Age and others had been released between Animal Crossing and Splatoon. Nonetheless, Splatoon was something of a mini-revelation: a team-based shooter where players shoot ink, and the goal is to cover more of the ground with your team color’s ink than the enemy team. It’s so simple and silly, but very effective. The series is now going strong with three entries and becoming massive in Japan, but I’ll never forget its out of left field introduction at E3 2014.
Standout Memory: Winning those shirts and lugging them around the show floor
Note to self, start wearing a backpack or something to these things (well, not E3 specifically, because… *Sob*). Thankfully I won the shirts between different days, but I still ended up slinging two or three over my shoulder each day of the event. I’d be watching the Metal Gear Solid V trailer or playing Kirby and the Rainbow Curse, Halo: The Master Chief Collection or Sonic Boom (yeah…) all while lugging those Super Smash Bros. t-shirts around. What a strange way for my initial streak of E3s to end.
2017
“The return.”
Favorite Game on the Show Floor: Super Mario Odyssey
Now here’s a Nintendo game I definitely don’t second guess placing here, because Super Mario Odyssey is one of the greatest video games ever made. It’s a non-stop cavalcade of ideas gleefully being thrown the player’s way. It’s a game where every moment is a blast. It just doesn’t relent with its inventiveness! In this day and age when it seems most games are more about showing off their extravagant budgets than anything else, Super Mario Odyssey was a beautiful reminder that fun and creativity reign supreme in the medium.
Runner-Up: Sonic Mania
Sega has repeatedly tried to resurrect the magic of the original Sonic the Hedgehog games on the Sega Genesis. In fact, the recent Sonic Superstars is proof that they’re still trying. But Sega (or, more accurately, a talented team of fans officially commissioned by Sega) actually achieved the feat in 2017 with Sonic Mania, which may very well be the best Sonic game ever made. Playing Sonic Mania for the very first time at E3 that year really took me back to my early childhood, when Sonic the Hedgehog was the coolest dude on the planet. Please Sega, more of this!
Standout Memory: Playing Dragon Ball FighterZ with my brother
It’s kind of sad that the final product of Dragon Ball FighterZ didn’t completely win me over, because my first experience with it was lovely. My brother also attended E3 in 2017, and though we went our own way through the show floor, we both met up to partake in Dragon Ball FighterZ. Me and my brother fought each other for a few rounds (rounds which seemed to last notably longer than in the final game). We both loved the look of the game (using the ‘3D anime’ style that had become popular in fighting games, but with Dragon Ball), and loved the way it played even more. It was simply a lot of fun. And a brotherly moment.
2018
“The end.”
Favorite Game on the Show Floor: Marvel’s Spider-Man
Although in retrospect Insomniac’s Spider-Man series of games seem to fall under the same umbrella as 99% of Sony exclusives (that is to say, watch a bunch of cinematics and then button mash during some quicktime events), at the time the game felt like a refreshingly lighthearted riff on the Batman: Arkham series. And it has to be said that Spider-Man controls exactly as he should (when you aren’t watching cinematics or in button-mashing quick time events, that is).
Runner-up: Super Smash Bros. Ultimate
Again, my enthusiasm for Super Smash Bros. had not completely dried out by this point, as there were still a number of disappointments to be had in the months that followed and after Super Smash Bros. Ultimate was released. But once again, this proved to be a great moment at that point in time. Though they only gave out pins as opposed to t-shirts for victories this time around, I received a few of those pins for my efforts. So the long lines were ultimately worth it.
Standout Memory: Taking a photo with Charles Martinet and attending E3 one final time.
While waiting in line (for I think Super Smash Bros?), the voice of Mario himself happened to be walking by (no, not Chris Pratt… or the new guy). Charles Martinet himself just happened to be passing by, and I got out of line to get a quick photo with him. Nice chap. And someone even held my place in line. How thoughtful.
On top of that, there was a weird sense of finality to E3 2018 for me, even back then. Though I still very much loved being there, I had grown so accustom to attending that the dwindling presence of the big publishers and developers (who were still present, but on a smaller scale) was noticeable. Something about the event just seemed like a good bookend to E3 for me (even if I would have loved to attend again). Super Smash Bros. was back, echoing the 2014 event (which ended my first string of consecutive E3s). And I said hi to Mr. Martinet again, as I did back at my first E3 way back in 2009.
I didn’t know it was my finale E3 at the time (there would only be one more proper E3 in 2019, followed by whatever you want to call the 2021 event), but it was a fitting sendoff to my times attending the show.
Thank you for the memories, E3. From the days I patiently waited to watch the event from home, to the eight wonderful events I was able to attend in person (making said younger self who watched at home do spiritual backflips in my heart). You will be missed!
The Last Part!
And now it’s time we bring things to a close for this year’s Christmas Special. I know, much like my 2023 as a whole, this Christmas post didn’t have as much variety as past years. I’ll just have to be sure to do better next year. I got to writing this in bits and pieces at the last minute. The fact that I have even finished it is something I’m proud of.
At the very least, I hoped you enjoyed reading what I had to write here in the introduction, my Top 10 Films of 2023 list, and my E3 memories. More importantly, I hope you had a happy holiday season, ate lots of gingerbread, said your ho ho hos, all that jazz.
Here’s hoping 2024 will be a productive year for you and me both. I have so many games I still need to review…
Wizard Dojo 